[Bonanzoid]

Oh, here's a better one.

Four men were in a boat on the lake. The boat turns over, and all four men sink to the bottom of the lake, yet not a single man got wet. Why?

Answer - they were married. I think most folk got it right. Auch, weel done the noo.

[Bonanzoid]

not a single man got wet.

Think about it.

[Bonanzoid]

Feck, I meant to quote that from me. Either way, that's a pretty obvious clue.

[Bonanzoid]

*claps*

Thanks to Elmo.

[Zoot]

nice and easy one -

What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?

[Ezza]

I actually know this one!

[Munki Bhoy]

Jim from American Pie.

Actually, in that instance it was three times... (hinting that he knows the answer)

Oh, while I'm at it... Where does it say bus was British? Insufficient information provided! Sunny would assume it was going the other way, and Bonanzoid now being in Europe won't have adjusted yet!

[S4B]

Five men were going into a church and it started to rain. Four of the men got wet but one of them stayed dry. How? (There are no umbrellas involved!!)

I've got a joke about this one once you have posted the answer.

Someone remind me.

I want Foots' joke so the answer is..............

4 of the men were pallbearers the other was in a coffin so therefore stayed dry.

Well done to those who got it right which I think was only Console, Foots and Zooty

[foot-loose]

Well, it's more of a ghost story to be honest.

Picture the scene. It's a dark, spooky, moonless night. The wind is howling through the streets, in the distance an owl hoots and a cat screeches.

Jim comes out from the pub, having wished his mates goodbye. He's had a couple of drinks, so he decides to walk home. On the way, he needs to pass the gates of the local cemetery. It was never the friendliest looking place, but even less so tonight. As he passed the gate, he heard a loud bang coming from the darkness inside the gate.

He decided not to look back but quickened his pace.

As he got to the corner of his road, he heard it again, this time louder. BANG. He looked back. Behind him was a coffin, rocking its way towards him. The door was creaking open and closed like the jaws of death. BANG CRASH.

Jim turned white, picked up a brick and threw it at the coffin. BANG BANG CRASH. The brick crumbled. Jim ran for his house, sweat pouring down his forehead. The coffin turned the corner and kept crashing towards him. BANG CRASH CRASH BANG. It was gaining on him and had nearly caught Jim when he reached his gate. Jim's son's baseball bat was lying on the grass, he picked it up and smashed it across the coffin BANG. The bat splintered and the coffin lunged forwards BANG. Jim ran into his house and slammed the door closed but the coffin smashed straight through CRASH!

Jim had no idea what to do. He knew his family were in danger now so he ran upstairs, flinging everything he could find at the coffin behind him. As he climbed, the closet of death was nearly on top of him and Jim knew the only place he would be able to hide would be the bathroom.

He fell through the door and pointlessly slammed the door behind him. CRASH. The coffin ate the door.

Jim was on the ground under the sink, wedged between the sink and the bath. The coffin was towering over him, its door banging menacingly. He started throwing everything he could grab at it but everything just bounced harmlessly off the oak wood finish.

Toothpaste. CRASH!

Mouthwash. BANG!

Veet hair remover. CRASH!

Bubble bath. BANG!

Cough syrup. The bottle shattered. Glass everywhere.





...And the coffin stopped.

*gets coat*

[S4B]

Oh god! I wish I'd waited a little longer now.

Here's another couple of riddles for you all to try while the tumble weed flies past slowly.



1. What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter.

And

2. When is a day longer than a year?

[S4B]

Well send me the ones you can think of then Miss Lottie. I could only think of one. I'd like your answers broken down into the different words.

[Boboff]

is it Scunthorpe & when you're stood behind an old man putting his change back in his Purse still stood at the till?

[S4B]

Boboff I love you!

[Zoot]

1. What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter.

One letter at a time from the front or from the end?

[S4B]

from wherever you please. Lottie has come up with 3 words that you can do this with!

[MK Chris]

In fact, does it have to be from either the front or the end, can you just take any letter out?

[S4B]

See my previous post Topher.

[Munki Bhoy]

Is the answer to the second one "when you're on Venus"? I'm sure there's a planet in our solar system which rotates backwards and it takes longer to do that than it does to go round the sun. Hence, a day is longer than a year. I'm almost certain it's Venus.

[S4B]

Munki you are supposed to PM your answers! Venus is not the answer I have - it's good but it's not right.

[Munki Bhoy]

I researched it and my answer is technically correct. Venus orbits the sun every 224.65 days, but completes one rotation every 243 days.

Rob DJ Pub Quiz rules though! If it's not what Rachel/S4B has, it's not right.

[S4B]

haha! very good - I think I may be having the same argument with Console though

[Console]

I researched it and my answer is technically correct. Venus orbits the sun every 224.65 days, but completes one rotation every 243 days.

It's actually more technically correct than the actual answer.

[S4B]

Oh shush Console I have said you can have the point! My game my rules!

[foot-loose]

Venus is right??

I fecking said that!

[S4B]

And I said you can have the point! These are my answers!

When is a day longer than a year?
When you are on Mercury. A day there is twice as long as a year, because Mercury rotates very slowly but travels around the sun quickly (less than 88 earth days).

What English word is nine letters long, and can remain an English word at each step as you remove one letter at a time, right down to a single letter.
The word is "startling." Remove the "l" and it becomes starting. Then remove the "t" and it is staring. The rest of the changes are as follows: string - sting - sing - sin - in - and finally, I.

Although as Lottie pointed out you could also have various other words including

Splatters-platters-platter-latter-later-late-ate-at-a
Cleansers-cleanser-cleanse-cleans-clans-cans-can-as-a

Ok a couple more easier ones

1. Two fathers and two sons go fishing, and each catches one fish to take home. Why do they bring only three fish home?

2. If you increase what you make in a year by 50%, and then the next year it falls by a third, are you making:
A) The same amount as you were making originally.
B) More than you were making originally.
C) Less than you were making originally.