[Bruvva]

According to some survey, this is what constitutes an ideal man...

1. 5ft 11in tall.
2. Good looking
3. 12.5st
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000
5. Blue eyes
6. Dark brown short hair
7. Have a BA degree
8. Never been married
9. No children
10. Three previous serious relationships
11. Medium build
12. Clean shaven
13. Drive silver merc
14. Enjoys the cinema
15. Likes eating out
16, Les than 6 sexual partners
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home
18. Non smoker
19. Dislikes football
20. Likes pets

So it basically boils down to rich and good looking. Please, women of this message board, tell me you're not all this shallow and vacuous?

[Yudster]

I know him. He's really boring.

[Vivienne]

Really rich - forget it!! Don't go for the materialistic types!

And good looking ? - well, beauty is in the eye of the beholder surely.

[MK Chris]

beauty is in the eye of the beholder

That's just something ugly people say.

[Console]

Hmm, I match 10 of those, so I'm only half-ideal (apparently).

[Zoot]

1. 5ft 11in tall. - Nope, Taller
2. Good looking - Nope
3. 12.5st - Nope
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000 - Nope
5. Blue eyes - Nope
6. Dark brown short hair - Yep
7. Have a BA degree - Yep
8. Never been married - Yep
9. No children - Yep
10. Three previous serious relationships - Nope,
11. Medium build - Nope
12. Clean shaven - Nope
13. Drive silver merc - Nope
14. Enjoys the cinema - Yep
15. Likes eating out - Yep (I prefer to to receiving... Bum tish!)
16, Les than 6 sexual partners - Yep
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home - Nope
18. Non smoker - Yep
19. Dislikes football - Yep
20. Likes pets - Yep

10/20 - I'm 50% perfect!!!!![list=][/list]

[Vivienne]

Hmm, I match 10 of those, so I'm only half-ideal (apparently).

so, which 10 are we talking about? In fact, I'll guess:

1. good looking 9. enjoys movies 10. non smoker
2. 12 stones approx.
3. blue eyes
4. never married
5. no kids.
6. 3 prev relationships
7. medium build
8. clean shaven

[Bruvva]

Oh I'll do my answers then

1. 5ft 11in tall - nope
2. Good looking - I'd shag me.
3. 12.5st - I wish
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000 - yup
5. Blue eyes - yup
6. Dark brown short hair - yup
7. Have a BA degree - BSc...You know, a proper one
8. Never been married - nope
9. No children - no kids
10. Three previous serious relationships - more than that
11. Medium build - not really
12. Clean shaven - when I can be bothered to shave
13. Drive silver merc - can't drive
14. Enjoys the cinema - who doesn't?
15. Likes eating out - who doesn't?
16, Les than 6 sexual partners - ahahahahahaha
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home - nope
18. Non smoker - don't smoke
19. Dislikes football - of course I like football, I have a soul
20. Likes pets - depends on how you cook them. Or if they're other people's.

[Console]

so, which 10 are we talking about? In fact, I'll guess:

You got two wrong, and another two half-wrong (I gave myself two 1/2 points).

Enjoys the cinema - who doesn't?

I hate the cinema. Movies, I like, the whole 'cinema experience' I detest.

[Vivienne]

Why don't you like the cinema experience? Most people love that... a nice evening, or morning, or afternoon out, plus popcorn & hotdogs.

[Console]

Well, popcorn would be a reason that I detest cinemas. People munching on popcorn is a really annoying and off-putting noise. Other than that, there's people talking, mobile phones, the lack of pause/rewind, the price and uncomfortable chairs.

[Yudster]

They are always too loud, the soundtrack blasts your ears to pieces everytime there is action or background music, meaning that you can't hear the dialogue - and there are other people there, all of whom have the potential to do things that will ruin your day. I'm with Console on this one.

[Vivienne]

Well, popcorn would be a reason that I detest cinemas. People munching on popcorn is a really annoying and off-putting noise. Other than that, there's people talking, mobile phones, the lack of pause/rewind, the price and uncomfortable chairs.

Good God, you have to learn not be so "strung up", Cons.

[MK Chris]

1. 5ft 11in tall - think I'm about that, I'll say yes.
2. Good looking - does that include average looking? If so I'll say yes to that too.
3. 12.5st - no idea.
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000 - nope.
5. Blue eyes - nope.
6. Dark brown short hair - yes (normally, though it needs a cut at the moment)
7. Have a BA degree - nope
8. Never been married - yes
9. No children - yes
10. Three previous serious relationships - nope
11. Medium build - I'd say about that
12. Clean shaven - yes
13. Drive silver merc - nope
14. Enjoys the cinema - yes
15. Likes eating out - yes
16, Les than 6 sexual partners - yes
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home - nope
18. Non smoker - yes
19. Dislikes football - 50/50.. I don't need to watch it. I'll say yes!
20. Likes pets - yes

So that's a maximum of 13.

[Yudster]

You need a new avatar then Topher.

[MK Chris]

Haha it's not meant to depict me.. I just find Andy Capp very funny.

[Boboff]

1. 5ft 11in tall. No
2. Good looking No
3. 12.5st Hmm, I was when I was 12
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000, have done, but no more
5. Blue eyes, grey
6. Dark brown short hair, no
7. Have a BA degree, no
8. Never been married twice
9. No children, two
10. Three previous serious relationships, well two really
11. Medium build, only if XXL is the new medium
12. Clean shaven, weekly
13. Drive silver merc, I am not an Indian Restraunt owner or a hair dresser so why should I?
14. Enjoys the cinema, no, I am with Console on that they are the Pits
15. Likes eating out, no too expensive and too fattening, I would rather cook.
16, Les than 6 sexual partners, A year ? I was in the Young Farmers !
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home, two
18. Non smoker, when asleep
19. Dislikes football, Argyle are ok.
20. Likes pets, well I do actually

So liking pets is my only redeeming feature ?
I think I better go and walk the dog, stroke the cats, feed the chickens, clean out the rabbits, and well the sheep had better watch out !

[Ballbag]

1. 5ft 11in tall. ------ taller
2. Good looking----ooooh yeah... sexy I'd say
3. 12.5st--------------5 ft 11 and 12.5 st, you'd be a right rake
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000 -----40,000 what?
5. Blue eyes ------ green
6. Dark brown short hair----- I once did, it's grey now
7. Have a BA degree-------nope, MSc though
8. Never been married-----currently am, but it don't make me less desirable.
9. No children---------------- that I know of
10. Three previous serious relationships-------- spot on
11. Medium build----------- medium build is code for tubby
12. Clean shaven---------- I can't grow anything anyway
13. Drive silver merc = twat ----- black alfa all the way
14. Enjoys the cinema------ I do
15. Likes eating out---------- I'm about to do so actually
16, Les than 6 sexual partners-------that'd be telling.. but yes
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home---- in total, I'm just under that.
18. Non smoker-------- I used to smoke, the chicks really dig it.
19. Dislikes football------no man dislikes football
20. Likes pets--------------Ask Elton about that.

[Andy B]

1. 5ft 11in tall. - Spot on
2. Good looking - Definately
3. 12.5st - About that
4. Earn more than ﾬ40,000 - I heard it was £30,000 so I'm giving myself a point for that, with overtime it's probably over £40
5. Blue eyes - Close enough
6. Dark brown short hair - Damn I'm a dirty blonde
7. Have a BA degree - Nah, started a Bsc but dropped out
8. Never been married - I haven't
9. No children - That I know of
10. Three previous serious relationships - define serious? Oh okay then I'd say yes to this one
11. Medium build - medium/slim so yeah
12. Clean shaven - Yes thanks to S4B's comments
13. Drive silver merc - Don't drive
14. Enjoys the cinema - Yup
15. Likes eating out - All the time
16, Les than 6 sexual partners - Ahhhhh let's just skip this one
17. Own a ﾬ400,000 home - Nope, still renting
18. Non smoker - buggered again
19. Dislikes football - Not on your nelly
20. Likes pets - MUFFIN!

13 out of 20, But I'm giving myself a bonus point for not driving for environmental reason, I use public transport all the time. so I get 14 out of 20

[Console]

Dislikes football------no man dislikes football

I'm a man, and football bores the crap out of me. I don't see the appeal of any sport, at least watching sport. Actually doing the sport can be fun, watching other people run around - dull.

[Vivienne]

Wouldn't you like to watch others doing your Pakora running?

[Zoot]

Wouldn't you like to watch others doing your Pakora running?

Is that like an indian food delivery service???

[Console]

Wouldn't you like to watch others doing your Pakora running?

No.

[Vivienne]

It's running he does. It's very dangerous apparently, and can result in injury (or even death).

[Console]

It's called Parkour, Viv.