The chrismoyles.net TV & Radio Show Reviews
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By Chris
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Playlist

1: The Bravery – An Honest Mistake, 2: Beyonce – Crazy In Love, 3: Green Day – Wake Me Up When September Ends, 4: Charlotte Church – Crazy Chick, 5: Coldplay – Fix You, 6: Jamiroquai – Feels Just Like It Should, 7: Razorlight – Somewhere Else, 8: Nelly – N Dey Say, 9: Oasis – Lyla, 10: Gwen Stefani – Whatcha Waitin’ For?, 11: Stereophonics – Superman, 12: Foo Fighters – Best Of You, 13: Travis – Sing, 14: Mylo – In My Arms, 15: The Coral – In The Morning, 16: Salt ‘n’ Pepa – Push It (tedious), 17: U2 – City Of Blinding Lights, 18: Tupac – Ghetto Gospel, 19: Kaiser Chiefs – Everyday I Love You Less And Less, 20: The Game feat. 50 Cent – Hate It Or Love It, 21: ? - Callifornia Soul


Big Brother

This years BB is fan-chuffing-tastic already, I am loving it like I’d love a cuddly puppy jumping out of a big birthday cake. The housemates are a selection of the worst people in Britain, and are, as is generally the case with the worst people, completely unable to either a) not wear a bikini for 85% of their waking hours, b) not swear persistently and c) not talk over one another, all the blessed time.

Little BB soundbites peppered this morning’s show, particularly Derek’s gasps of queenly delight upon entering the house. In the absence of Kamal’s “don’t fail me now, bitch” plea to his outfit as he entered the house, I was pleased to hear Maxwell’s “She started giving it the big ‘I am’, Charlie Big Potato, giving it all the lemon”, which is nonsensical yet massively humourous.

Highlights of the team’s visit to the BB house last week were played again, initially involving Aled being held hostage in the bedroom and the team not doing anything to get him out, and choosing booze and fags instead. Dave was evicted, for being a bit of a bitch about football tickets mainly. As the whole team left, an unidentified member blew a kiss goodbye to the house. It was more interesting than this synopsis belies, honestly.


Car Park Catchphrase

A girl from Leeds vs. a boy from Burton-On-Trent. Both contestants initially seemed surprisingly alert and vaguely amusing for CPC people. Chris and Dave taking the piss out of the posh boy was almost funny, but sometimes Chris just comes across like a rubbish sulky child whose only witty retort to anything is to mimic the voice of the contestant. Car Park Catchphrase is just so over.


Other things

Dave recommended that Chris went to see a paediatrician to have the hard skin on his feet hacked off. When Rachel suggested that maybe he actually meant a podiatrist, Dave argued “no, they’re the ones that cut hedges into interesting shapes”

Dour reviewer in “actually genuinely enjoying a Coldplay song” shocker – “Fix You” almost brought a tear to my eye, though it would have been better if it was done by Embrace, obviously.

Rachel hoping to introduce U2 at Live 8 – “hellaaow oi’m Raaachul, ploise welcaaam yaaaow taaow!”. Heeheehee. Comedy Kidderminster accents never get old.

Dom is a big old scary U2 geek, and he knows all manner of trivia about them, and is just a bit weirdy. Who knew that Larry Mullen Jr. used to sing before old Bonio did? Who knew that the Edge wears a hat all the time because he’s bald? Probably many people, in fact. Chris’s impression of Bono also never gets old.