chrismoyles.net
- Tue Feb 24, 2004 10:16 am
#241867
1. Kylie Minogue - Love At First Sight 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. The Strokes - Reptilia, 3. Jennifer Lopez - Baby I Love U! (R. Kelly remix), 4. The Darkness - Love Is Only A Feeling, 5. BUZZ OFF - Iggy Pop - Lust For Life, 6. Basement Jaxx feat Lisa Kekaula - Good Luck 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Puddle Of Mudd - Blurry, 8. Britney Spears - Toxic, 9. George Michael - Amazing 8:00 NEWSBEAT 10. The Farm - Groovy Train, 11. 50 Cent - If I Can't, 12. Deepest Blue - Give It Away, 13. DJ Casper - Cha-Cha Slide 8:30 NEWSBEAT 14. Outkast - Hey Ya, 15. Blink 182 - I Miss You, 16. Angel City feat Lara McAllen - Love Me Right, 17. Beenie Man feat Ms.Thing - Dude, 18. Kylie Minogue - Confide In Me (Tedious Link), 19. Red Hot Chili Peppers - By The Way, 20. N*E*R*D - She Wants To Move, 21. Jamelia - Thank You 9:30 NEWSBEAT 22. N Sync feat Nelly - Girlfriend, 23. LMC vs U2 - Take Me To The Clouds Above, 24. Usher feat Ludacris - Yeah
With Mysterious Girl heading for top spot this weekend, daytime producer Greyhead (still dying for any chance to get on the air) has recorded a selection of new “Andrania” jingles for the show. Chris played them this morning. They feature Martin Luther King and Neil Armstrong and urge people to buy the single as apparently “it will be something to tell your grandchildren about in 30 years time”. Chris hasn’t bought it yet and said he is saving himself until after the midweek charts come out, although he said he would genuinely wet himself with excitement if it went straight in at number one. People who have bought the record already include Anthony, Kayleigh, Paul and Holly - all of whom featured in a little montage after phoning Aled’s stand in Laura to say they’d bought it. Chris was upset that now Peter is (almost) “back in the charts and back in our hearts”, other people are trying to take the credit for his single going to numero uno, saying it is down to their campaigns and not mentioning Chris. These include that frump off GMTV and Victoria Newton in the Bizarre column in The Sun. She is also celebrating the fact that she has found Andre’s partner in crime, Bubbler Ranx (after another “campaign”). Chris said Scott Mills did that last week and she really should keep up with the times. His exact words were “Victoria, if you want to jump on a bandwagon then give Jo Whiley a ring”. Yesterday was of course Chris’s birthday show and he left all his presents at Radio 1 after finishing the show. These included a huge chocolate cake delivered by Dougie and Fran from Travis, which had mysteriously disappeared by this morning. Chris wanted to know who the culprits were. Dave was helpful - “Nominate Rachel”. Rachel and Dave claimed they had eaten some, but only one tiny piece each. Rach’s excuse was that Chris told them they could eat it. Chris said he meant the cheap crappy sponge one that Rachel herself had bought from Cakeworld down the road. Laura and some scabs from the other shows scoffed the rest, with slap head Byrne left with none at all. Chris said he wasn’t Mr cakes-on-wheels or the cakey bar kid and they should all go and get their own. He said to get his own back he would nick some of Rachel’s Weightwatchers spicy lettuce...or whatever she has. Chris said the fatties at Weightwatchers wouldn’t be pleased with her eating chocolate cake, despite her continued protests that she only had a “slither”. Today is Shrove Tuesday and Juliette said she was looking forward to some gooey mess with the golden syrup tonight...on her pancakes of course (good mornin). Bearing in mind all Chris’s weight jibes at her, Rachel asked him when he was going to finally start the fitness campaign that he has been promising to start since January. Chris said he couldn’t go training today as he has to go to the dentists.
MOYLES AT THE DENTISTS:
Yep, Chris is going to the dentists today and dreading it. His appointment is at 12 and he admitted that he is a big girls blouse when it comes to the dentist. This information came briefly before 8am and what started out as a casual conversation soon spiralled out of all control and became the major topic of the show today. Chris was interested to know how long the team brush their teeth for each day as he used to do it for just 10 seconds, but is now trying to make more of an effort bearing in mind his current tooth troubles. Dave brushes for 30 seconds using his electric toothbrush, although Chris thinks electric toothbrush users are just plain lazy. We are not. Chris just completely failed to grasp the concept of how they work and disagreed with Daves statement that they are proven to be more effective and better for you than normal ones. Chris wouldn’t accept he was wrong (for a change) so hence “call 08700 100 100 now if your a dentist”. Richard from Nottingham and Blake from Wolverhampton both went on the air and (surprise surprise) agreed with Dave. Chris then accepted he was wrong although Dominic stuck up for him and said that he brushes manually and has never had any fillings. The jammy sod - four fillings, two braces and teeth galore out for me. Another thing that was annoying Chris about his check-up later today is the fact that he has to pay for it. Rachel paid £14 for her appointment yesterday. Dave spent £35 the last time he went and numerous other text messages came in, such as “I had to pay £50 Chris” and “I spent £120 on a filling” etc. Dave said that his appointment last year was the first time he had been to the dentists since 1993 (yes a whole decade) and he said that he just had a “minor fillingette” and some scraping off of excess plaque. Juliette said her last appointment cost her the bizarre total of £5.48. Dave was interested in the dental fees being mentioned and wanted to ask if they were tax deductible, but screwed up his pronunciation...
Dave - Is it tax deduxable?
Chris - Deduxable? That’s the name of Bill Cosby’s character in his TV show
Dave - No that was Dr Huxtable
Chris - Oh right OK
(Dom and Rach laugh)
Chris read through some more texts...
Chris (reading) - Chris, just paid 42 quid for an extraction...(stops reading)..Oh! I had to pay even more than that for the one in the bathroom which broke
Dave - That’s an extractor fan
Chris - Sorry
Dave - They’re different
(Dom and Rach laugh)
Chris (despite loving the record) said he had no idea what Britney is singing about in her new tune Toxic. After playing it this morning there was a five minute link where everyone analysed and dissected the lyrics. Dominic thinks the way she sings “I’m on a ride” makes her sound like she’s putting on a Dublin accent. Dave talked about the time Britney passed through the afternoon studio one day as she was travelling the wrong way. He said she was rude and didn’t even say hello. Aled talked to her though and Rachel has met her a few times, saying she’s very nice and not at all a bit of a cow (as chris had suggested). Dave suddenly layed off his criticism as he remembered Rachel is trying to book her as a guest for the show. With Aled’s continued absence due to a viral infection, Dom filled in for him again on Buzz Off today. Chris selected the Iggy Pop classic Lust For Life - his first decent choice in almost a week. Dave buzzed on 3:15 as no-one was saying anything, Dom followed on 3:48 as he needed to write the weather for the 7:30 news and Rachel buzzed on 4:15 as she was watching the clock. Less than 2000 texts came in though and the song was played in full.
THE CHRIS MOYLES SHOW ON THE ROAD - LIVE IN SOUTHAMPTON:
After the success of the Tyneside trip last month, the show is once again going to go *(adopt Irish accent)* Moyles away. To Southampton in fact, where the show will be live this Friday between 6:55 and 10am. Why Southampton you might wonder? Well it’s for the simple reason that Dave bought a Spin Doctors album on cassette there in 1993. Check last Thursdays review if you’re still confused. Southampton is of course the birthplace of both Craaiigg Daaavid and erm, Scott Mills. Chris has put in a bid for both but I wonder who’ll come on...clue - “good mornin homebase”. Following on from this announcement, a barrage of abusive texts coming from the Portsmouth area reached the show. Dave explained the hatred between Pompey and Southampton to Chris, who had the perfect solution. Get two top heavy lovelies (one in a Saints kit and one in a Pompey kit) to swap shirts at a Southampton roundabout at 8:15 on Friday morning. The slogan would be “One Love for Breasts”. Pictures on the website please. The team will be on the lash in Southampton on Thursday night, with Chris on the look out for hot chicks, Dave wanting stimulating conversation and Rachel wanting karaoke bars. Chris asked her what her solo karaoke song of choice is. She said the classic Son-Of-A Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield, which I just can’t listen to without thinking of Pulp Fiction. Chris had it cued up and ready for Rach to belt out. She wouldn’t though. Not one line. Chris called her a miserable cow and Dave told her “to find the voice within”. Chris threatened not to talk until she sung and warned her about the emergency DAT kicking in. Despite 5 minutes of him telling her to sing, she still wouldn’t sing a word. The texts came flooding in - “Your sad, don’t be a baby”, “Do it for Kiddy”, “Will would have done it’, “Rachel you’re a let down”, “Sack Rachel and bring back Will” being just a few examples. Chris even said the mayor of Kidderminster has ordered a burning of all Rachel related merchandise at Kidderminster Community Centre tonight.
More on the trip to Southampton - here.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
KARAOKE MIKE who runs a karaoke show in Exeter 2
LAURA a lazy 23 year old home-maker from Whitby 0
Jo Whiley gave Chris a donut-type cake and a birthday kiss yesterday. Chris said she tried to slip the tongue in and he’s sure she’s still after a bit of the Moylesmeister. This resulted in another funny hand over at 10 o’clock today...
Chris (shouting over the intro to Franz Ferdinand - Jo’s 1st song) - JO WHILEY, SHE TRIED TO SLIP HER TONGUE IN MY MOUTH...ONLY ON RADIO 1
Jo - Yeah you believe that and you’ll believe anything
Chris - YOU DID! YOU BLOOMIN DID!!!....A woman of your age as well
Jo - Get off my show you fat git
Chris - Oh ho ho! Right, I’m not having that (turns off fader to Jo’s studio and starts off like he’s about to rant)...I’M SORRY BUT...oh no go on then (switches fader back up to hit Franz Ferdinand vocal)
Daves Tedious Link
Primal Scream Rocks - Primal Scream are fronted by Bobby Gillespie, who shouldn’t be mistaken for Dizzy Gillespie who plays the trumpet - The trumpet was formerly the instrument of choice of EastEnders character Sonia Jackson - Sonia Jackson shares the same surname as welsh athlete Colin Jackson who I think is from Cardiff, as is Charlotte Church - Charlotte Church is a female singer of an operatic nature and in that respect shares something in common with Dame Kiri Te Kanawa, who is from New Zealand - New Zealand is where Daniel Bedingfield is currently recuperating after a nasty accident, which involves him wearing a head brace which I think is a type of neck protection - Neck protection in the form of a neck brace is also worn by Avid Merrion, although in his case I think it’s purely cosmetic - Cosmetics are bought predominantly by women, as are tights - Tights are sold in chemists even though I always think they look slightly out of place - Plaice is a type of fish - Fish are regarded as being seafood, as are prawns and shrimps and stuff - Shrimps are traditionally thrown on the barbie by Australians - and when you think of Australians or more importantly celebrity Australians who have been hugely successful in the world of pop music and have a particularly attractive bottom, you think of Kylie Minogue - Which links us to Kylie Minogue and Confide In Me
With Mysterious Girl heading for top spot this weekend, daytime producer Greyhead (still dying for any chance to get on the air) has recorded a selection of new “Andrania” jingles for the show. Chris played them this morning. They feature Martin Luther King and Neil Armstrong and urge people to buy the single as apparently “it will be something to tell your grandchildren about in 30 years time”. Chris hasn’t bought it yet and said he is saving himself until after the midweek charts come out, although he said he would genuinely wet himself with excitement if it went straight in at number one. People who have bought the record already include Anthony, Kayleigh, Paul and Holly - all of whom featured in a little montage after phoning Aled’s stand in Laura to say they’d bought it. Chris was upset that now Peter is (almost) “back in the charts and back in our hearts”, other people are trying to take the credit for his single going to numero uno, saying it is down to their campaigns and not mentioning Chris. These include that frump off GMTV and Victoria Newton in the Bizarre column in The Sun. She is also celebrating the fact that she has found Andre’s partner in crime, Bubbler Ranx (after another “campaign”). Chris said Scott Mills did that last week and she really should keep up with the times. His exact words were “Victoria, if you want to jump on a bandwagon then give Jo Whiley a ring”. Yesterday was of course Chris’s birthday show and he left all his presents at Radio 1 after finishing the show. These included a huge chocolate cake delivered by Dougie and Fran from Travis, which had mysteriously disappeared by this morning. Chris wanted to know who the culprits were. Dave was helpful - “Nominate Rachel”. Rachel and Dave claimed they had eaten some, but only one tiny piece each. Rach’s excuse was that Chris told them they could eat it. Chris said he meant the cheap crappy sponge one that Rachel herself had bought from Cakeworld down the road. Laura and some scabs from the other shows scoffed the rest, with slap head Byrne left with none at all. Chris said he wasn’t Mr cakes-on-wheels or the cakey bar kid and they should all go and get their own. He said to get his own back he would nick some of Rachel’s Weightwatchers spicy lettuce...or whatever she has. Chris said the fatties at Weightwatchers wouldn’t be pleased with her eating chocolate cake, despite her continued protests that she only had a “slither”. Today is Shrove Tuesday and Juliette said she was looking forward to some gooey mess with the golden syrup tonight...on her pancakes of course (good mornin). Bearing in mind all Chris’s weight jibes at her, Rachel asked him when he was going to finally start the fitness campaign that he has been promising to start since January. Chris said he couldn’t go training today as he has to go to the dentists.
MOYLES AT THE DENTISTS:
Yep, Chris is going to the dentists today and dreading it. His appointment is at 12 and he admitted that he is a big girls blouse when it comes to the dentist. This information came briefly before 8am and what started out as a casual conversation soon spiralled out of all control and became the major topic of the show today. Chris was interested to know how long the team brush their teeth for each day as he used to do it for just 10 seconds, but is now trying to make more of an effort bearing in mind his current tooth troubles. Dave brushes for 30 seconds using his electric toothbrush, although Chris thinks electric toothbrush users are just plain lazy. We are not. Chris just completely failed to grasp the concept of how they work and disagreed with Daves statement that they are proven to be more effective and better for you than normal ones. Chris wouldn’t accept he was wrong (for a change) so hence “call 08700 100 100 now if your a dentist”. Richard from Nottingham and Blake from Wolverhampton both went on the air and (surprise surprise) agreed with Dave. Chris then accepted he was wrong although Dominic stuck up for him and said that he brushes manually and has never had any fillings. The jammy sod - four fillings, two braces and teeth galore out for me. Another thing that was annoying Chris about his check-up later today is the fact that he has to pay for it. Rachel paid £14 for her appointment yesterday. Dave spent £35 the last time he went and numerous other text messages came in, such as “I had to pay £50 Chris” and “I spent £120 on a filling” etc. Dave said that his appointment last year was the first time he had been to the dentists since 1993 (yes a whole decade) and he said that he just had a “minor fillingette” and some scraping off of excess plaque. Juliette said her last appointment cost her the bizarre total of £5.48. Dave was interested in the dental fees being mentioned and wanted to ask if they were tax deductible, but screwed up his pronunciation...
Dave - Is it tax deduxable?
Chris - Deduxable? That’s the name of Bill Cosby’s character in his TV show
Dave - No that was Dr Huxtable
Chris - Oh right OK
(Dom and Rach laugh)
Chris read through some more texts...
Chris (reading) - Chris, just paid 42 quid for an extraction...(stops reading)..Oh! I had to pay even more than that for the one in the bathroom which broke
Dave - That’s an extractor fan
Chris - Sorry
Dave - They’re different
(Dom and Rach laugh)
Chris (despite loving the record) said he had no idea what Britney is singing about in her new tune Toxic. After playing it this morning there was a five minute link where everyone analysed and dissected the lyrics. Dominic thinks the way she sings “I’m on a ride” makes her sound like she’s putting on a Dublin accent. Dave talked about the time Britney passed through the afternoon studio one day as she was travelling the wrong way. He said she was rude and didn’t even say hello. Aled talked to her though and Rachel has met her a few times, saying she’s very nice and not at all a bit of a cow (as chris had suggested). Dave suddenly layed off his criticism as he remembered Rachel is trying to book her as a guest for the show. With Aled’s continued absence due to a viral infection, Dom filled in for him again on Buzz Off today. Chris selected the Iggy Pop classic Lust For Life - his first decent choice in almost a week. Dave buzzed on 3:15 as no-one was saying anything, Dom followed on 3:48 as he needed to write the weather for the 7:30 news and Rachel buzzed on 4:15 as she was watching the clock. Less than 2000 texts came in though and the song was played in full.
THE CHRIS MOYLES SHOW ON THE ROAD - LIVE IN SOUTHAMPTON:
After the success of the Tyneside trip last month, the show is once again going to go *(adopt Irish accent)* Moyles away. To Southampton in fact, where the show will be live this Friday between 6:55 and 10am. Why Southampton you might wonder? Well it’s for the simple reason that Dave bought a Spin Doctors album on cassette there in 1993. Check last Thursdays review if you’re still confused. Southampton is of course the birthplace of both Craaiigg Daaavid and erm, Scott Mills. Chris has put in a bid for both but I wonder who’ll come on...clue - “good mornin homebase”. Following on from this announcement, a barrage of abusive texts coming from the Portsmouth area reached the show. Dave explained the hatred between Pompey and Southampton to Chris, who had the perfect solution. Get two top heavy lovelies (one in a Saints kit and one in a Pompey kit) to swap shirts at a Southampton roundabout at 8:15 on Friday morning. The slogan would be “One Love for Breasts”. Pictures on the website please. The team will be on the lash in Southampton on Thursday night, with Chris on the look out for hot chicks, Dave wanting stimulating conversation and Rachel wanting karaoke bars. Chris asked her what her solo karaoke song of choice is. She said the classic Son-Of-A Preacher Man by Dusty Springfield, which I just can’t listen to without thinking of Pulp Fiction. Chris had it cued up and ready for Rach to belt out. She wouldn’t though. Not one line. Chris called her a miserable cow and Dave told her “to find the voice within”. Chris threatened not to talk until she sung and warned her about the emergency DAT kicking in. Despite 5 minutes of him telling her to sing, she still wouldn’t sing a word. The texts came flooding in - “Your sad, don’t be a baby”, “Do it for Kiddy”, “Will would have done it’, “Rachel you’re a let down”, “Sack Rachel and bring back Will” being just a few examples. Chris even said the mayor of Kidderminster has ordered a burning of all Rachel related merchandise at Kidderminster Community Centre tonight.
More on the trip to Southampton - here.
CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
KARAOKE MIKE who runs a karaoke show in Exeter 2
LAURA a lazy 23 year old home-maker from Whitby 0
Jo Whiley gave Chris a donut-type cake and a birthday kiss yesterday. Chris said she tried to slip the tongue in and he’s sure she’s still after a bit of the Moylesmeister. This resulted in another funny hand over at 10 o’clock today...
Chris (shouting over the intro to Franz Ferdinand - Jo’s 1st song) - JO WHILEY, SHE TRIED TO SLIP HER TONGUE IN MY MOUTH...ONLY ON RADIO 1
Jo - Yeah you believe that and you’ll believe anything
Chris - YOU DID! YOU BLOOMIN DID!!!....A woman of your age as well
Jo - Get off my show you fat git
Chris - Oh ho ho! Right, I’m not having that (turns off fader to Jo’s studio and starts off like he’s about to rant)...I’M SORRY BUT...oh no go on then (switches fader back up to hit Franz Ferdinand vocal)
Daves Tedious Link
Primal Scream Rocks - Primal Scream are fronted by Bobby Gillespie, who shouldn’t be mistaken for Dizzy Gillespie who plays the trumpet - The trumpet was formerly the instrument of choice of EastEnders character Sonia Jackson - Sonia Jackson shares the same surname as welsh athlete Colin Jackson who I think is from Cardiff, as is Charlotte Church - Charlotte Church is a female singer of an operatic nature and in that respect shares something in common with Dame Kiri Te Kanawa, who is from New Zealand - New Zealand is where Daniel Bedingfield is currently recuperating after a nasty accident, which involves him wearing a head brace which I think is a type of neck protection - Neck protection in the form of a neck brace is also worn by Avid Merrion, although in his case I think it’s purely cosmetic - Cosmetics are bought predominantly by women, as are tights - Tights are sold in chemists even though I always think they look slightly out of place - Plaice is a type of fish - Fish are regarded as being seafood, as are prawns and shrimps and stuff - Shrimps are traditionally thrown on the barbie by Australians - and when you think of Australians or more importantly celebrity Australians who have been hugely successful in the world of pop music and have a particularly attractive bottom, you think of Kylie Minogue - Which links us to Kylie Minogue and Confide In Me
