[The Cornishman]

Good to see John Mcenroe has 'still got it'.He was reported to be spitting venom at a top London hotel recently after being presented the wrong breakfast cereal.Mcenroe was seen hands on hips,frowning at the offending 'Golden Grahams' proclaiming "You cannot be Cheerios"




Sorry.

[Mr Dion]

ahh thats was a poor effort!!lol

[The Cornishman]

Mcenroe was later seen at a star gazing observotary glaring into the telescope fuming "You cannot be Syrias"

[Mr Dion]

getttin worse...

[The Cornishman]

He was later sighted on a plane,when Osoma Bin Laden walked down the aisle in full pilot regalia. "You cannot be steering us"

[Mr Dion]

ok that one was way off

[Adam]

i like ceral. i go through 4 pints of milk a day in my house.

[Dr_Funk]

good god man u need a hobby!!!!
or a hug or sumthin!!

[Dr_Funk]

o i mean cornishman ... theres nothin wrong with likin cereal a whole lot ads!!!

[gem]

Heh that was bl**dy funny.


(Tries to think of one, fails miserably, slopes off.)

[stevotrash]

I heard that whilst also in london he visited a top london sex clinic after becoming friendly with a french foreign exchange ball boy, after his consultation with an expert an insider heard john scream, 'it can not be syphalis'.

[The Cornishman]

[kendra k]

and how did you hear this one stevo?

i don't drink milk anymore, it makes me feel sick.

[Jonny Hoare]

or did you about the time when macenroe wlaked into the san siro- "you cannot be serie a's"

[The Cornishman]

The former tennis star recently took up a job lecturing Sports Science at Oxford University-half way through his speech Mr Mcenroe became enraged by a group of Chinese students laughing and giggiling in the back room-he stopped mid sentence pointed a quivering finger at the offending group and snarled "You Cannoks,be serious"

[Dr.Solomon Berkoff]

Ha Ha Ha Ha What a brilliant idea for a thread. By the way 'The Cornishman' is that your real name?

[Everlast]

after complaining of a bad stomach John McEnroe walked into the doctors and said "It cannot be Bylious"

[stevotrash]

Contray to those reports, McEnroe's great love of wildlife entertainment encouraged the feisty sporting legend to take up a job as 'entertainments co-ordinater' at London Zoo. His position involves motivating the creatures to perform and entertain the paying pubic by recreating musicals and caberet numbers. Whilst training in the bird sanctuary, John became furious with the lack of enthusiasm displayed by one feathered friend reportadley screaming manically,

'Touccan! Not be be serious'

[TJD]

punchline: you cannot be cyprian. someone please make up the rest of the joke, i'm too tired.

[The Cornishman]

McEnroe excelled himself recently when he won 1st prize at a london agricultural competition after impressing judges by tieing house plants into various ribbons and bows with one hand.Family Fortunes presenter Les Dennis was in charge of proceedings and upon presenting the prizes he asked McEnroe which catagorey he was entered in.
Beaming McEnroe puffed up his chest and proudly annouced "Yucca Knot B-Series Host"