[A(THE?)MARK_AND_LARD_FAN]

Tonight at 9 on UK bilge.<P>'Eh,Charlie; did u play in the constabulary footie match yesterday?'<br>'No,Frank; I find it a bit too manly for me'<br>'Ooh! U should have been there,Charlie - this lovely PC from the other constabulary took me out of the game with a hard tackle from behind'

[the_dr]

LOL! Very good.

[Guest]

you have to send that in to moyles. very good stuff.

[A(THE?)MARK_AND_LARD_FAN]

Thank u.<br>I'm hoping that other members will post spoof camp cops 'sketches' as I think this is a very funny feature and should perhaps replace the dire feature that is 'the not'.

[Tom_Murphy]

replace "constbulary" with any "group of employees".<P>replace "PC" with any "related employee"<P>it would be boring after a day.

[Ionic_Storm]

I just love Will's voice acting on that  :)

[Baza]

'His lobster thermadore is to die for'

[A(THE?)MARK_AND_LARD_FAN]

'Could u take down this young lads particulars?'<br>'I'll take down anything u want; BIGBOY!'<P>Classic.<br>

[Simon]

are there any mp3's of these sketches about? they are brilliant

[Guest]

i'll look for 'em one day. i've definately got a few, just never have the time to find them. <P>the best ones are when they all crack up laughing at the end.  :)

[Uglybob]

uk bilge 9pm camp cops<br>a siege at the local station<P>"shut it you ****, im going put these handcuffs on you"<P>"oh yes, frank told me about this, remember the legs too, the blindfold, yes that too, im so excited"<P>"uhh, you going all funny on me"<P>"come here big boy, let me touch your stubble on your cheeks"<P>"aaaah lets get out of ere, lads"<P>"damn, i cant keep a good man down"

[Uglybob]

s.lag  was starred out why ever for

[Guest]

what a poor 1 ugly bob, i know i couldnt do better, but eh, im still gunna **** take on u.

[Uglybob]

go on kyle try it

[stevotrash]

Bobs idea was slightly less obvious and wasn't built around the one phrase so much.

[Uglybob]

was that a compliment, im not sure

[Uglybob]

jamie theakston talks about what happened yesterday in a feature called<P>"I LOVE YESTERDAY"

[Uglybob]

"you policing the local disco tonight,charlie, im asked the dj if he needs any help with his tweeters"<br>"thats super can i come up and play"<br>"course you can, ill even let you twiddle my knob too"<br>"great"<P>that any better<br>

[Guest]

dun dun du duh duh duh DUn DUh DU duh duh duh DUMMMMMM<P>"Oh charlie we had a bit of trouble trying to get into michael barrymore's house last week. "<P>"oh <I>really</I> frank?"<P>"yeah. <insert 'back door/entrance' gag here>"<P>poor. very poor. lets face it bob. we wont get anywhere near the class that was m&l's fan's effort.

[Simon]

Somebody somewhere can u please upload the camp cops clips?

[A(THE?)MARK_AND_LARD_FAN]

I've thought of a punch-line for the original:<P>Frank: 'Eh,Charlie; did u play in the constabulary footie match yesterday?'<br>Charlie: 'No,Frank; I find it a bit too manly for me'<br>Frank: 'Ooh! U should have been there,Charlie - this lovely PC from the other constabulary took me out of the game with a hard tackle from behind'<br>Charlie: 'I thought u were talking about the footie-match - not the after match shower'<P>ps: I actually thought your handcuffs one was pretty amusing.<P>

[Guest]

i have the link they did about camp cops from wednesday!  :)<P>christoph harris choose your bitrate now.

[Chris]

High as you like

[Tom_Murphy]

that's great chris but he asked what bitrate you wanted. plus i don't think it's really appropriate to flaunt your pot habit on a message board frequented by minors ok?

[the_dr]

Muahahahahaha!<P>May I recommend 64kbps/mono, Monkey? Same quality as 128 - but 1/2 the size.<P>the_dr