The chrismoyles.net TV & Radio Show Reviews
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By Chris
#241840
1. Sugababes - Hole In The Head 7:00 NEWSBEAT 2. Pink - God Is A DJ, 3. DJ Sammy feat Yanou & Do - Heaven, 4. Beyonce Knowles - Me, Myself and I, 5. BUZZ OFF - Foo Fighters - Next Year, 6. Liberty X - Everybody Cries 7:30 NEWSBEAT 7. Good Charlotte - Girls & Boys, 8. The Black Eyed Peas - Shut Up, 9. MOYLES - Michelle All This Time Parody, 10. Justin Timberlake - Rock Your Body 8:00 NEWSBEAT 11. The Strokes - 12:51, 12. Motorcycle - As The Rush Comes, 13. Daniel Bedingfield - Gotta Get Thru This, 14. Nelly Furtado - Powerless 8:30 NEWSBEAT 15. Aaliyah - More Than A Woman, 16. Ultrabeat - Feelin' Fine, 17. Christina Aguilera - Beautiful, 18. LMC vs U2 - Take Me To The Clouds Above, 19. Republica - Ready To Go (Tedious Link), 20. Dido - Life For Rent, 21. Ferry Corsten - Rock Your Body Rock, 22. Blu Cantrell feat Sean Paul - Breathe, 23. Joss Stone - Fell In Love With A Boy, 24. Jaimeson feat Angel Blu & CK - Take Control 9:30 NEWSBEAT 25. Room 5 feat Oliver Cheatham - Make Luv, 26. Kelis - Milkshake, 27. Evanescence - Bring Me To Life, 28. Fatman Scoop - It Takes Scoop

Chris finally decided to go for that long overdue run this weekend. He ran round the 2.8 mile “park circuit” yesterday morning, in a time of 26 minutes. Quite impressive but Chris swore he used to be able to do it in 20. He went on his own as both Sophie and Dave turned down the offer to join him. Dave was too busy watching the “Sunday treble” of The Premiership, Jimmy Hill and Goals on Sunday. Chris said hello to the transit wagon full of policemen and women giving him stick while he ran round the park. He told them to “go and catch some bloody criminals instead of laughing at me”. Dave again pointed out the fact that he got taken to jail in one of those transit vans once (it was the time when Dave got arrested while bladdered for peeing on a shop window). Chris also got a long overdue haircut over the weekend, as his hairdresser Robert is now back from his holiday. It always used to be Hassan in Leeds who cut his hair and now it’s only Robert in London. Chris won’t let anyone else cut it. He told of how he looked like “Rock God Moyles” when he moved to London, as a result of going 8 months without a haircut. Dave said he remembered the first time after that when Chris went in to get it cut at Guys & Dolls in Southend on the roadshow, but reappeared with the most spectacular mullet you’ve ever seen and as the spitting image of Billy Jay Cyrus. Chris said that was in the days he didn’t pay £60 for a haircut though. Rachel said even she doesn’t pay that much. Chris said he could tell and Dave agreed that Rachel’s hair looks like Diego Forlan’s at the moment. Juliette stuck up for Rachel and said it didn’t, but Chris said she was hardly in a position to talk as her hair is a mixture of purple and red - “She looks like a colourblind punk”.

Chris got a selection of texts in asking to hear the Wolves goal from Kenny Miller that beat Man Utd over the weekend. Chris said he was hardly in a position to start taking the pee out of Man U bearing in mind Leeds’ position at the moment (they are bottom again now) so decided to keep with his tradition over the last week and open up a first hour text poll asking whether or not he should play it. 5242 people were arsed to text in and 75.22% wanted to hear the goal. Chris and Dave said they were close personal friends with one of Wolves' biggest assets, Wolfie the mascot. Chris said they had bonded after the three of them spent a morning in the boozer recording last season’s “Chris and Daves Top 10 Cracking Goals” for the BBC FA Cup Coverage. Chris said Wolfie’s head smells though. The Wolves - Man U result aside, Chris and Dave both didn’t want to talk any more about the weekend action though because (again) they didn’t want “to alienate non-football lovers”. In other words, Leeds and Everton both got beat. In other breakfast team football, Juliette’s beloved Port Vale won 5-1, Kiddy Harriers drew 1-1 and in the big match of the weekend, Aled’s Aberystwyth lost 5-3 at Rhyl. Third week on the new show and Buzz Off is still going strong. Chris’s choice today was New Year from the Foo Fighters. It lasted for 3mins 19secs with Dave elegantly buzzing off the end to keep to timings. Aled was first on 2:16, Rachel on 2:49 and the listeners third on 3:20. Don’t forget there is a new part of the site dedicated to Chris’s Buzz Off choices and all the stats and trivia that go with them. You can view it here (updated daily by Uglybob). Chris wanted to talk about Page 3 for a change. He thinks fresh new talent is needed and todays girl, Kate 19 from Liverpool qualifies in that category. Chris took the pee out of The Sun’s “News In Briefs” feature, where Page 3 girls give their views on the burning news issues of the day. Dave said it was “good to get a news perspective from a different angle” and said the it was interesting to read what they had to say, with the bonus of their (*lamacq*) loverly knockers to look at of course. Chris also mentioned the fact that Peter Kay is to appear in Corrie on the 30th of January. Chris yet again appealed to Peter to come on the show (it seems like he’s being doing this for about 2 years), if not then he said he’d settle for Paddy McGuinness or Toby Foster. Chris couldn’t see why Peter or Paddy won’t come on the show. Toby won’t cos he hates Chris’s guts and I’m pretty sure that’s the same reason Paddy and Peter won’t.

HI THIS IS WES CHART CHIT-CHAT:
Wes was on at 7.45 to talk about all things chart, slightly aggrieved to have been woken from his mucky dream. He said that in the dream he was getting down to some knitty gritty with a mystery female pop singer that he wouldn’t reveal. Chris thought it was probably that tub of lard Michelle McManus as he said he frequently dreams about her:
Chris - I had a dream about me and Michelle and we were just all over each other...
Wes - Urrrrghh. With baby oil?
Chris - No no. It was the all you could eat buffet at pizza hut. It was the best 4 hour dream I’ve ever had.
Wes ran through the top ten and was first interrupted by Chris asking him how the number 10 song by The Black Eyed Peas went. Wes sang the chorus down the phone and continued, only to be interrupted by Dave asking how the next song went. This continued for the whole top 10, with Rachel and Aled joining in. Wes was quite funny and ended up singing most of the songs. (This will be a long running gag I’m sure - listen next week and Chris is sure to ask again). Wes was going to Portsmouth to see mates today but said he would see Chris in the pub for a pint on Wednesday.

DANIEL BEDINGFIELD INTERVIEW:
Daniel was live on the phone from New Zealand at ten past 8, with an annoying 2 second time delay. If you haven’t heard, Daniel was in a pretty serious car crash over new year and has been in hospital up until last week, although he is still wearing a neck brace screwed into his skull and will be doing so for the next 6 weeks, 3 months at most. Chris told him about the pictures of him outside church in todays tabloids. The fact that he can’t leave NZ until he’s fully recovered means he can’t make The Brits next month. He’s shockingly up for 3 awards although he thinks they’ll be won by Dido, Will Young and Justin Timberlake. Dave and Chris offered to pick up any award he does win on his behalf, in comedy (Avid Merrion) neckbraces. Daniel didn’t seem so keen on the idea. Chris told Daniel to stick his neckbrace on eBay when he recovers as then at least he can make a bit of cash out of the fact he nearly died. Daniel said he’s actually a bit of a chick magnet at the moment as he has been getting lots of sympathy from the ladies since he was hospitalised. He’s throwing a “I’m Not Dead Party” on Wednesday night which Chris and Dave were invited to, although for some reason Dave didn’t reckon they could make it back in time for Thursday’s show. Considering he is usually a bit of an arse when he’s on the show, I thought Daniel was a lot less annoying than usual but that’s probably down to the fact that you can’t be that jolly with a neck brace screwed to your skull. He’ll be back on the show later in the year and guests still to come this week include Dale Winton and hopefully Pink live in the studio on Friday morning’s show.

NEW YORK, NEW YORK SO GOOD WE PLAY IT TWICE:
Radio 1 is going to New York over the weekend Thurs 29 Jan - Sat 31 Jan 2004 and all this week Chris and Sara Cox are running a competition to send one lucky winner over there VIP stylee. It’s geniously entitled “New York, New York So Good We Play It Twice” although it’s actually played 8 times. Once in the morning and afternoon Mon-Thurs and the people with the top 4 scores qualify for the final with Chris on Friday morning. The questions last for one minute and are based on a theme of America. You can find more on the Radio 1 mini-site at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/events/newyork2004.shtml. The jingles are voiced by Westwood and Chris had a clip from him on CD:UK at the weekend, saying he respects Blazin Squad’s music. Chris said he thought they were crap, but said he’s just a shock-jock so what does he know. No they are crap Chris. It’s not a good look baby.

CONTESTANT: LISA from the West Midlands
QUESTIONS: (A=answer, 1pt correct, correct answers in italics)
1. Who is the host of the Radio 1 Rap Show? (A - Tim Westwood) 1
2. True or False - JFK airport is in Los Angeles (A - False) 1
3. In which US state did Britney Spears recently get married? (A - Nevada) 1
4. Destiny’s Child are from which city? (A - Pass) X 0 (Houston)
5. Who spent part of last year suspended above the Thames in a perspex box? (A - David Blaine) 1
6. In which American state would you find New York City? (A - Manhattan) X 0 (New York State)
7. Jennifer Lopez is currently dating which Hollywood actor? (A - Ben Affleck) 1
8. True or False - The Miami Dolphins are an American football team? (A - True) 1
9. What was the title of the Christmas single by Kelly and Ozzy Osbourne? (A - Changes) 1
10. Cape Canaveral is in which US state? (A - Pass) X 0 (Florida)
11. Which city are Madonna and Eminem both from? (A - Detroit) 1
12. What is the name of Jude Law’s co-star in the film Cold Mountain? (A - Nicole Kidman) 1
13. True or False - Las Vegas is the capital of California? (A - False) 1
14. In which US city would you find the Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz? (A - San Francisco) 1
15. Which American actor stars in the film The Last Samurai? (A - Tom Cruise) 1
16. True or False - Brad Pitt starred in the Guy Ritchie film Snatch? (A - True) 1
TOTAL SCORE = 13 POINTS

CARPARK CATCHPHRASE:
MIKE a Renault finance consultant from Wrexham 2
ALICIA a sales executive from Cambridge 1

After the pips at 10am, Jo Whiley began her show by playing a clip of Five Live commentary from the Leeds - Southampton match at the weekend, introing into her first song:
Commentator - And when you’re going down, everything goes wrong
(Jingle + Song Starts)
Chris - Says more about you than it does about me Jo
Jo - Why thankyou

Daves Tedious Link
C & C Music Factory Gonna Make You Sweat - Sweat can smell if left for a long time and in that respect shares much in common with milk - Milk is a big favourite with babies - Babies wear very small shoes and clothes - Clothes are hung out to dry - Too dry is how you might describe a desert that hasn’t seen any rain for a long time - Time After Time was a big hit for Cyndi Lauper - Lauper rhymes with Pauper which is one way of describing the street urchin Oliver - Oliver’s Army was a huge hit for Elvis Costello - Elvis Costello shares the same first name as Elvis Presley who in turn shares the same surname as Reg Presley who wrote Love Is All Around, the enormous Wet Wet Wet hit from the movie Four Weddings And A Funeral which starred Hugh Grant - Hugh Grant once got in a sticky situation with Divine Brown - Brown Girl In The Ring was a big hit for Boney M - Boney M are from Germany - Germany borders the Czech Republic and the word Republic in Czech is probably pronounced Republica or something - which links us to Republica and Ready To Go

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