The chrismoyles.net TV & Radio Show Reviews
User avatar
By Chris
#241786
1. No Doubt feat Bounty Killer - Hey Baby, 2. The Strokes - 12:51, 3. Craig David - World Filled With Love, 4. Rachel Stevens - Sweet Dreams My LA-Ex 3:30 NEWS 5. Liberty X - Jumpin (crap segway no.1), 6. Nickelback - Someday, 7. Basement Jaxx feat Dizzee Rascal - Lucky Star, 8. Lumidee - Never Leave You (Uh-Oooh), 9. Ian Van Dahl - I Can't Let You Go, 10. Fatman Scoop feat The Crooklyn Clan - Be Faithful, 11. Nelly Furtado - Turn Off The Light, 12. Alex Parks - Maybe That’s What It Takes 4:30 NEWS AND SPORT 13. Pink - Trouble (crap segway no.2), 14. DJ Sammy - Boys Of Summer, 15. Blazin' Squad - Flip Reserve, 16. Love Inc - You’re A Superstar 5:00 NEWS AND SPORT 17. The White Stripes - 7 Nation Army, 18. 50 Cent feat Snoop Dogg - P.I.M.P, 19. Sugababes - Caught In A Moment (album track), 20. Plummet - Damaged, 21. The Waterboys - The Whole Of The Moon (Tedious Link), 22. The Black Eyed Peas feat Justin Timberlake - Where Is The Love?

After yesterday’s no show Chris was back making excuses. He spent the first half hour of today’s show graphically describing his troubles at both ends yesterday, if you know what I mean. Chris said he could have caught the bug off his girlfriend Sophie but suspected that it may have been via some Radio 1 exec coughing near the air con unit on Monday.
Chris said he made use of both his 2 toilets - one for the mouth waste and one for the leaky bum bum waste. He said he even got scented candles out to try and reduce the smell. Chris said he was in bed all yesterday and didn’t bother answering any afternoon calls. One turned out to be from Duran Duran leg-end Simon LeBon who was inviting Chris to Duran Duran’s first performance together in 18 years in London last night. Chris heard the voicemail too late to get there but said he was too ill to go anyway.
Dr Mark from The Sunday Surgery was on the line to try and help Chris out. He said Chris’s case sounded like a classic case of Gastroenteritis and said that he had probably lost about 500 Weightwatchers points. Chris said he’d make up for it with a big booze up and slap up meal on Friday. George from Newsbeat wasn’t happy with
Chris discussing his symptoms on the air and sounded completely appalled when Chris said he is wearing a makeshift nappy of tissues in his undercrackers today in case of an accident. Dave said he’d never heard anything so ridiculous in his life.
Chris said he had to come in today as he is freelance and wouldn’t get paid. Dave said he’d cope. Chris said ‘well it’s your birthday coming up soon’. Dave said it was in April. Chris said he was saving up as every penny counts. Dave wondered what he is going to get him with six months of saving up. Just before 4 o'clock Beyoncé was live on the phone as she is back London performing at Fashion Rocks for The Prince’s Trust at The Royal Albert Hall tonight. While she is performing there will be models modelling Armani etc around the stage. Chris said he was meant to be a model but had to pull out because of his illness. Chris wants to get Beyoncé in the studio to teach her some English phrases like he did last time. She said he should come and see her on her upcoming UK tour. She said she had no support acts as yet so Chris and Dave said they could do it. She asked them to sing for her and they sang I’ll be there by Mariah Carey with a touch of reverb, which Beyoncé appreciated. Chris seemed to be encouraged and she seemed less impressed by him singing Love Train by the O’Jays (hi kids) a minute later. Chris said she should steal lots of Armani clothes tonight - she should just get them off the hook and in the bag. Dave did his traditional ‘no diggity’ which she laughed at. Chris said (when she had gone) that in the Crazy In Love video she walks in big strides which her butt cheeks back, much like himself today. He did the walk for Rachel and Dave but I think it was more of a visual thing.
David Dickinson from Bargain Hunt was also on the phone today. He congratulated Chris on getting the breakfast show and said he will be listening every morning. He also called Chris the greatest disc jockey in the world, which Chris made him say again so he can put it on a trail. He also asked Chris when he was getting married but Chris said the line was poor and he couldn’t hear him. Chris plugged to death the phone and text numbers to vote for Bargain Hunt for the best factual TV show at the National TV Awards, although David got very confused by how text works and Chris had to explain it to him.
The 78 Days of Christmas appeal was back, trying to get Xmas Light switch-ons for the team. There has been official invites so far from such exotic locations as Inverness, Weymouth, Swansea, Milton Keynes and Rachel’s home town Kidderminster. She said Chris would be disappointed if he went but he said he was sure Kidderminster is a burning metropolis of fun and culture. Still no invite from Leeds, although apparently they have shown an interest. Chris listed what he has done for Leeds (including support Leeds United during their hour of need - ‘a bloody long hour’) and the council said they would get back to him by 5.45, although Chris forgot about it. David ‘luv’ Garido was back on reading the sport and Chris said Garido got all his sports news from Ceefax, that’s why there were such big pauses in his bulletins (while he presses reveal, hold etc.)
Rachel’s mum is 60 today. She said if Chris said happy birthday to her then it would raise her street cred at school. Chris asked ‘Is she still at school?’ but Rachel explained she is a teacher. Chris and Dave said happy birthday Mrs Jones. The Mystery Afternoon sound today was the engine of a Peugeot 205 revving up (there’ll be another tomorrow). Chris had some new stuff to play today. He played the Basement Jaxx tune with Dizzee Rascal which he’s unsure of but Dave likes. He also played Alex from Fame Academy’s debut single which he is also unsure of
but Dave likes. Both hated Blazin Squad’s new one which was the usual bilge but had a funny intro. Chris told a Sophie Ellis Bextor joke that came in on the text - ‘She has been found dead on the floor of a French football player’s hotel room . It’s murder on Zidanes floor’ (Zi dancefloor - geddit....)
There was news also today that the show will be coming live from Radio 1’s One Live In Brighton on Halloween, Friday October 31st. Chris screwed up his timings for The Tedious Link so ended up about 2 minutes late and had to make do with some cartoon ‘bongs’ for pips.

Daves Tedious Link
Incognito Always There - Incognito are led by a man called Bluey - Bluey is also the term for the sort of video you might have imported from Copenhagen - Copenhagen is the capital of Denmark - Denmark is famous for bacon - Bacon is made from pigs - Pigs live in Stys - Stys can also be found in your eyes - Stys In Your Eyes sounds a bit like Stars In Their Eyes which is a programme hosted by Matthew Kelly - Matthew Kelly shares the same surname as Henry Kelly who was most famous for hosting the Pan European TV Quiz Going For Gold - Going For Gold was the biggest chart hit for Shed Seven - Shed Seven are led by frontman Rick Witter - Witter rhymes with Litter which is the term for the multiple birth of puppies - Puppies are baby dogs - Dogs are related to wolves - Wolves are famous for their tendency to howl at the moon - and when you think of the word ‘moon’ in the context of a mid 80’s top 30 smash by an Anglo-Irish long haired folk rock beat combo made up of boys who like water, you think of The Waterboys - which links us to The Waterboys and The Whole Of The Moon

Sat and today are up