chrismoyles.net
- Thu Sep 26, 2002 5:05 pm
#241530
1. Jakatta/Seal - My Vision 2. Missy Elliott - Get Ur Freak On 3. Red Hot Chili Peppers - The Zephyr Song 4. Mary J Blige - Family Affair 5. Dirty Vegas - Days Go By NEWS 6. Liberty X - Got To Have Your Love 7. Supergrass - Grace 8. Craig David - Whats Your Flava (Tat For Tit Advert) 9. Holly Valance - Kiss Kiss 10. Strokes - Someday 11. Avril Lavigne - Complicated 12. Faithless - We Come One 13. The Coral - Dreaming Of You 14. Truth Hurts - Addictive NEWS 15. Eminem - Cleaning Out My Closet 16. No Doubt - Underneath It All 17. Datsuns - Im In Love 18. Oakenfold - Starry Eyed Surprise NEWS 19. Puddle Of Mudd - She Hates Me 20. Ian Van Dahl - Castles In The Sky 21. Busted - What I Go To School For 22. Ja Rule - Livin It Up 23. Pink - Just Like A Pill 24. The La's - There She Goes 25. Nelly & Kelly - Dilemma 26. Foo Fighters - All My Life
Lizzie was off on her penultimate day so Jess filled in for her. Jess brought with her a Guess Who and that was Kylies Ex James Gooding or that scruffy fella to blokes.
Chris played a Guess Who with the team even though he knew the team wouldnt get it. It was Jim Broadbent, an actor whos been in several films like Bridget Jones Diary, Moulin Rouge and Iris but I remember him mostly for playing the bent copper who always popped up in Only Fools and Horses. They played the Georgina Best Of with Mark Goodier again after the 3:30 news.
Chris was told by Dave and Will that they had a tape of what the medium told Dave at the Psychic Fair and Will had edited to the main points. In the clip it says that Dave will decieve someone and he will have an accomplice but he will be eventually found out. You can see the punchline coming a mile away, cant you? We join it after the clip was heard by Chris.
Dave - Woooh, scary stuff.
Chris - That was the medium.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - You are telling me that was the medium that did your reading, talking about lies and deceit.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - And someone helping you out in your lying and deceit.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - And then you being found out, that was the medium there.
Dave- Yeah.
Chris - Definitely.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - 100%.
Dave - Absolutely.
Chris - Thats Antonia from upstairs in the office isnt it... cos I recognise her voice.
Dave - Antonia?
Chris - Thats Antonia in the office isnt it.
Dave - No her name was Stella.
Will - Psychic Stella.
Chris - Did you even go last night?
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - Really, you didnt go did you, you got Antonia upstairs up in the offices and recorded her. Will, Look at me.
Will - Hmm.
Chris - Did Dave have a reading done last night?
Will - Um, no.
Chris - Where did you end up last night? When you rang me last night, where were you?
Will - In the pub.
Chris - In the pub where the Psychic readings were?
Dave - The other one down the road.
Chris - Right meeting now (plays Craig David)
Chris - These 2 lazy bumbling idiots. We spent not only yesterday but also last Wednesday talking about the Psychic Fair. In total maybe 45 minutes was wasted of my life talking about a psychic fair. You went there last night and you bottled out and then you went to the pub round the corner. Pathetic! What happened then?
Dave - We did actually go to the pub and we did actually go upstairs and we went into the mystic room but these two women were a bit scary looking and looked a bit not like our sort of people and then in the corner was all these people and they were all silent. It was like heavy, heavy stuff and they were all waiting to see these two mystics who were in the corner. Now they were about 30 people waiting and we would have been there for at least an hour and we couldnt talk in there. It wasnt that sort of place, we were thinking we would have a beer and a laugh and then after watch the match but it wasnt like that at all.
Chris - So you didnt get a reading. How long were you in there for before you left?
Dave - Well there was nowhere to sit.
Chris - How long, Will?
Will - About 5 minutes.
Chris - 5 minutes, how long Dave, look me in the eye and tell me, it wasnt 5 minutes, was it?
Dave - Might have been a minute.
Chris - ONE MINUTE!
Dave - We got some leaflets though.
Chris (saracastic) - Oh great, thats great isnt it, can the leaflets foresee the future? Is the leaflet saying the words P45 on it?
Dave - We did think about going back but we were too jarred by then.
Chris then went to the phone to Uri Gellar otherwise known as Jon Culshaw to talk about the paranormal with the gag being that Uri's voice turned into Yoda at the end of each sentence.
Gym Lady Jane came in to the studio live to talk about Sundays run and Big Blubber. Chris and Lizzie didnt come out all week. Dave and Will went out but their attitude was not good. That meant that there was no winner of Big Blubber. Jane talked about the 10k run and she had a big announcement.
That announcement was that after 2 years of hard toil, Jane is leaving the team and going to the Far East. Chris launched Gym Idol to find the new trainer for Chris and the team. Jane has lined up 4 possible replacements and the team have to pick their favourite. They will interview all 4 on the show and the winner revealed next Friday.
Jane will be in all week next week. Chris and Dave requirements are for a qualified slapper that can run and has nice breasts. Dave doesnt want any Dolph Lundgren lookalikes.
Jane - I dont know if theyre going to be too impressed by the quality of the client.
Chris - Phwoar, check out her, no way she looks like Lionel Richie.
Jane - Were not getting you a trainer to have you stare and gawp at them.
Dave - But the aesthetic beauty of a trainer is very important. It is motivational. Its like a carrot on a stick to a donkey.
Jane - So you keep training with a girl with big breasts and long hair and your gonna think Im gonna look like that.
Chris - Well im thinking a woman with long blonde hair, nice tight bottom, large breasts would make me get up in the morning.
Dave - Yeah a Lycra clad luvvly.
Chris - and seriously Ive seen fit women sweat and its a bit of a turn on.
Jane - Well luckily im going to be one of the judges so we are going to get a quality trainer, not just some bimbo.
Chris - No I want someone who can at least run a mile.
Dave - Like the ones of Aerobics Oz Style on Sky.
Chris - Yeah and I once got from Tony Cook, whos a record plugger, he once gave me a copy of the All Nude Workout 2. Now the girl that led that:she was very fit, very very fit.
Jane - Sorry I didnt search in any dirty magazines for the potential new trainer.
Chris - No your getting the wrong end of the stick. We just dont want a slapper, we want a slapper who is fit and can run.
Dave - A qualified slapper.
Chris - Absolutely, like yourself, no that came out wrong, your not qualified. You picked the 4 already. How many are women.
Jane - Half and Half, 50/50 split.
Chris - No im not having someone like that, I dont want Dana International training me.
Jane - Youve got 2 men and 2 women...
Dave - and one thats not sure.
More Guess Whos with Chris as Jane joined in. Chris was Sylvester McCoy dressed as Dr Who. Chris correctly guessed Craig Charles after Will gave the game away. Will chatted to him. Chris brought back Mystic Horse for a special event. Chris let the Mystic pick a horse in the 5:15 at Goodwood and had put £20 on it at the bookies. Mystic Horse predicted Summer View to win and it came Second so they lost their money. It was 15/2 and he would have won £170 if it won.
Daves Tedious Link
Tone Loc Funky Cold Medina - An adaption of Funky Cold Medina entitled Funky Ford Cortina recently appeared in a coffee advert - Dave used to own a Ford Cortina - After the Cortina died, he bought a Capri - Capri is the name of an island of the coast of Italy - Italy is the home of Zucchero - Zucchero duetted with Paul Young on the song Senza Una Donna - Donna Air launched her career in Byker Grove - Byker Grove is set in Newcastle - Spender was also set in Newcastle - Het Big Spender was a 1967 hit for Shirley Bassey - Bassey rhymes with Lassie - Lassie is the worlds most famous collie- Collie rhymes with Dollie - Dollies are for children - The Teletubbies are also for children and one of the Teletubbies is called La La - Which links us to The La's with There She Goes from 1990.
Lizzie was off on her penultimate day so Jess filled in for her. Jess brought with her a Guess Who and that was Kylies Ex James Gooding or that scruffy fella to blokes.
Chris played a Guess Who with the team even though he knew the team wouldnt get it. It was Jim Broadbent, an actor whos been in several films like Bridget Jones Diary, Moulin Rouge and Iris but I remember him mostly for playing the bent copper who always popped up in Only Fools and Horses. They played the Georgina Best Of with Mark Goodier again after the 3:30 news.
Chris was told by Dave and Will that they had a tape of what the medium told Dave at the Psychic Fair and Will had edited to the main points. In the clip it says that Dave will decieve someone and he will have an accomplice but he will be eventually found out. You can see the punchline coming a mile away, cant you? We join it after the clip was heard by Chris.
Dave - Woooh, scary stuff.
Chris - That was the medium.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - You are telling me that was the medium that did your reading, talking about lies and deceit.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - And someone helping you out in your lying and deceit.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - And then you being found out, that was the medium there.
Dave- Yeah.
Chris - Definitely.
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - 100%.
Dave - Absolutely.
Chris - Thats Antonia from upstairs in the office isnt it... cos I recognise her voice.
Dave - Antonia?
Chris - Thats Antonia in the office isnt it.
Dave - No her name was Stella.
Will - Psychic Stella.
Chris - Did you even go last night?
Dave - Yeah.
Chris - Really, you didnt go did you, you got Antonia upstairs up in the offices and recorded her. Will, Look at me.
Will - Hmm.
Chris - Did Dave have a reading done last night?
Will - Um, no.
Chris - Where did you end up last night? When you rang me last night, where were you?
Will - In the pub.
Chris - In the pub where the Psychic readings were?
Dave - The other one down the road.
Chris - Right meeting now (plays Craig David)
Chris - These 2 lazy bumbling idiots. We spent not only yesterday but also last Wednesday talking about the Psychic Fair. In total maybe 45 minutes was wasted of my life talking about a psychic fair. You went there last night and you bottled out and then you went to the pub round the corner. Pathetic! What happened then?
Dave - We did actually go to the pub and we did actually go upstairs and we went into the mystic room but these two women were a bit scary looking and looked a bit not like our sort of people and then in the corner was all these people and they were all silent. It was like heavy, heavy stuff and they were all waiting to see these two mystics who were in the corner. Now they were about 30 people waiting and we would have been there for at least an hour and we couldnt talk in there. It wasnt that sort of place, we were thinking we would have a beer and a laugh and then after watch the match but it wasnt like that at all.
Chris - So you didnt get a reading. How long were you in there for before you left?
Dave - Well there was nowhere to sit.
Chris - How long, Will?
Will - About 5 minutes.
Chris - 5 minutes, how long Dave, look me in the eye and tell me, it wasnt 5 minutes, was it?
Dave - Might have been a minute.
Chris - ONE MINUTE!
Dave - We got some leaflets though.
Chris (saracastic) - Oh great, thats great isnt it, can the leaflets foresee the future? Is the leaflet saying the words P45 on it?
Dave - We did think about going back but we were too jarred by then.
Chris then went to the phone to Uri Gellar otherwise known as Jon Culshaw to talk about the paranormal with the gag being that Uri's voice turned into Yoda at the end of each sentence.
Gym Lady Jane came in to the studio live to talk about Sundays run and Big Blubber. Chris and Lizzie didnt come out all week. Dave and Will went out but their attitude was not good. That meant that there was no winner of Big Blubber. Jane talked about the 10k run and she had a big announcement.
That announcement was that after 2 years of hard toil, Jane is leaving the team and going to the Far East. Chris launched Gym Idol to find the new trainer for Chris and the team. Jane has lined up 4 possible replacements and the team have to pick their favourite. They will interview all 4 on the show and the winner revealed next Friday.
Jane will be in all week next week. Chris and Dave requirements are for a qualified slapper that can run and has nice breasts. Dave doesnt want any Dolph Lundgren lookalikes.
Jane - I dont know if theyre going to be too impressed by the quality of the client.
Chris - Phwoar, check out her, no way she looks like Lionel Richie.
Jane - Were not getting you a trainer to have you stare and gawp at them.
Dave - But the aesthetic beauty of a trainer is very important. It is motivational. Its like a carrot on a stick to a donkey.
Jane - So you keep training with a girl with big breasts and long hair and your gonna think Im gonna look like that.
Chris - Well im thinking a woman with long blonde hair, nice tight bottom, large breasts would make me get up in the morning.
Dave - Yeah a Lycra clad luvvly.
Chris - and seriously Ive seen fit women sweat and its a bit of a turn on.
Jane - Well luckily im going to be one of the judges so we are going to get a quality trainer, not just some bimbo.
Chris - No I want someone who can at least run a mile.
Dave - Like the ones of Aerobics Oz Style on Sky.
Chris - Yeah and I once got from Tony Cook, whos a record plugger, he once gave me a copy of the All Nude Workout 2. Now the girl that led that:she was very fit, very very fit.
Jane - Sorry I didnt search in any dirty magazines for the potential new trainer.
Chris - No your getting the wrong end of the stick. We just dont want a slapper, we want a slapper who is fit and can run.
Dave - A qualified slapper.
Chris - Absolutely, like yourself, no that came out wrong, your not qualified. You picked the 4 already. How many are women.
Jane - Half and Half, 50/50 split.
Chris - No im not having someone like that, I dont want Dana International training me.
Jane - Youve got 2 men and 2 women...
Dave - and one thats not sure.
More Guess Whos with Chris as Jane joined in. Chris was Sylvester McCoy dressed as Dr Who. Chris correctly guessed Craig Charles after Will gave the game away. Will chatted to him. Chris brought back Mystic Horse for a special event. Chris let the Mystic pick a horse in the 5:15 at Goodwood and had put £20 on it at the bookies. Mystic Horse predicted Summer View to win and it came Second so they lost their money. It was 15/2 and he would have won £170 if it won.
Daves Tedious Link
Tone Loc Funky Cold Medina - An adaption of Funky Cold Medina entitled Funky Ford Cortina recently appeared in a coffee advert - Dave used to own a Ford Cortina - After the Cortina died, he bought a Capri - Capri is the name of an island of the coast of Italy - Italy is the home of Zucchero - Zucchero duetted with Paul Young on the song Senza Una Donna - Donna Air launched her career in Byker Grove - Byker Grove is set in Newcastle - Spender was also set in Newcastle - Het Big Spender was a 1967 hit for Shirley Bassey - Bassey rhymes with Lassie - Lassie is the worlds most famous collie- Collie rhymes with Dollie - Dollies are for children - The Teletubbies are also for children and one of the Teletubbies is called La La - Which links us to The La's with There She Goes from 1990.
