chrismoyles.net
- Thu Jul 24, 2003 8:17 pm
#241737
Chris has had more trouble with his flat feet and he went to see his chiropodist. The chiropodist said he needed to flex his feet more, so said that whenever he brushes his teeth he should go backwards and forwards up to tip-toes. Not only has this improved his flexibility in his feet, he also brushes his teeth for longer. Chris said he’s also got some new mouthwash which says on the bottle it should be gargled with the tongue stuck out. Dave said that Chris must look like some sort of strange experiment when he’s brushing his teeth.
Greyhead had had a lot to drink last night and just before he went home Chris asked him if he wanted another drink. Will said he thought he’d had too much, but Chris persuaded him to have another half. Will proceeded to down the half then went home. Will said his local kebab shop was perfectly positioned so that by the time he’s bought his kebab and walked home, the kebab is finished and the papers can go into the bin before he goes into the house. He said this is useful because his flat never smells of kebabs.
Big Blubber 3 - The Final Push
This weeks sextathlon event was circuit training. Aled started well recording the fastest number of press-ups and crunches. Aled did the most pull-ups, which put him ahead with a healthy lead. However, his performance was marred somewhat when he accidentally pressed the emergency stop button on the running machine.
Will was last in the press-up discipline, but did 60 crunches in a minute which meant he was ahead of the rest of them. Wills burpees were very sloppy and didn’t score highly for artistic effort. Dave scored highly in press-ups, but his weakness was in the rowing discipline.
Chris arrived 15 minutes late and Scott wasn’t impressed when Chris failed to do any pull-ups. Chris said he had more weight to pull up than anyone else. However Scott was impressed at how well Chris tried in all the other disciplines. Aled picked up the 10 points, Chris got 6 points and Dave and Will shared 3 points each.
Dr Hamilton joined the team for sex talk. He had a Sex Quiz for the team. Yesterday they had a condom cam. Here are the questions:-
1. Name 3 types of contraception?
Chris said Dave and Wills lass taking her make up off
2. Name 3 sexually transmitted diseases?
Dave said that he gets a form of herpes on his back.
3. What is Ithyphallophobia?
A. Fear of erect penises.
4. What is Venus Observa the latin for?
A. The Missionary Position
5. How many gallons of sperm does the sperm whale produce in one ejaculation?
A. 400 gallons
6. What is the average shelf life for a condom
Dave - Some of mine are older than Live Aid
A. 2 years
7. What is the age of sexual consent in the UK
A. 16
8. On average how often do men think about sex?
A. 7 seconds
9. Which is the odd one out, Jimmy Hat, Coil and the Johnnie?
A. The coil
10. Which of the following is not a STD, Climidia, Coitaphobia, trachamoniasis?
Coitaphobia - fear of sex
Tiebreak - How many women would sleep with a man if he refused to wear a condom
ANSWER - 45%
ROBBIE ROUND ONE
1. What is the name of Robbies mum? (Janet)
2. Shes the One was the double A side with which other track? (Its Only Us)
3. Robbie has played in 3 testimonial matches at Vale Park, True or False (True)
4. What was the highest chart position of Let Me Entertain You? (3)
5. In which year did Robbie join Take That? (1991)
6. Which song goes Sing me a love song, drop me a line? (No Regrets)
7. Which album featured Nutsford City Limits? (Sing When Your Winning)
8. Who duetted with Robbie on Kids? (Kylie)
9. What year was Rock DJ released? (2000)
10. With which record company did Robbie sign a multi million pound deal with last year? (emi)
still no phone call from Robbie
ROBBIE ROUND TWO
1. What is the name of Robbies dad? (Pete Conway)
2. What was Robbies first number 1? (Millennium)
3. True or False, Chris Sharrock is the name of the bass player of Robbies live band?
False - hes the drummer
4. Lazy Days got to which position? (8)
5. In which year did Robbie leave Take That? (1995)
6. Which song has the lines Live for Liposuction, detox for your rent? (Millennium)
7. Which album featured Jesus in a Camper Van? (Ive Been Expecting You)
8. Which former musical partner did Robbie write Angels with? (Guy Chambers)
9. Which year saw the release of the single Supreme? (2000)
10. True or False, Robbie has a sister called Sally?
True, he does
BB ALED
Big Brother decided to be nice and although they lost the task, they got up this morning to see the house all decked in Xmas material, well they had to do something with it, they bought it.
The Radio 1 staff voted for Cameron to win. Ray still thinks that Jon can win. Jon still has a problem with Cameron and called him a wet little rag. They brought back the pedalo and horses from the earlier tasks and dressed them up as a reindeer and the sleigh. Chris is convinced one wont come on the show like in previous years. Last year Jade and Alex didnt come in.
Daves Tedious Link
Madonna Into the Groove - Madonna is from Detroit, something she shares in common with Eminem - Eminems mother in 8 Mile was played by Kim Basinger - Basinger also starred in 9 and a Half Weeks alongside Mickey Rourke - Mickey Rourke shares the same christian name as Mickey Adams who manages Leicester - Leicester used to be sponsered by Walkers - Walkers are advertised by Gary Lineker and once by Michael Owen who is team mates with Steven Gerrard - Steven Gerrard shares a name with Gerard Depardieu who starred in Green Card alongside Andie McDowell - Andie McDowell share the same first name with Andi Peters who used to live in a broom cupboard as does Harry Potter under the stairs - Stairs can be a hindrance to elderly people forcing them to rethink and move into a bungalow - Bungalow is actually an Indian word and other Indian words are Naan and Kulfi - Kulfi is a type of exotic ice cream, something it shares with Vienetta - If you remove the last syllable from the word Vienetta you get Vienna which was a big hit for Ultravox and lead singer Midge Ure who I would imagine these days is enjoying the fruits of his musical labours and probably owns a flash car and lives in a house, a very big house in the country - Which links us to Blur and Country House
Fergus Dudley birthday today. His voice was heard on the show briefly and a cake was presented but none of the candles were lit because of health and safety. Aled sang Happy Birthday to Ferg in Welsh. Chris got some free stuff from Boots which were for Advanced Teeth Whiteners and an electric toothbrush.
Greyhead had had a lot to drink last night and just before he went home Chris asked him if he wanted another drink. Will said he thought he’d had too much, but Chris persuaded him to have another half. Will proceeded to down the half then went home. Will said his local kebab shop was perfectly positioned so that by the time he’s bought his kebab and walked home, the kebab is finished and the papers can go into the bin before he goes into the house. He said this is useful because his flat never smells of kebabs.
Big Blubber 3 - The Final Push
This weeks sextathlon event was circuit training. Aled started well recording the fastest number of press-ups and crunches. Aled did the most pull-ups, which put him ahead with a healthy lead. However, his performance was marred somewhat when he accidentally pressed the emergency stop button on the running machine.
Will was last in the press-up discipline, but did 60 crunches in a minute which meant he was ahead of the rest of them. Wills burpees were very sloppy and didn’t score highly for artistic effort. Dave scored highly in press-ups, but his weakness was in the rowing discipline.
Chris arrived 15 minutes late and Scott wasn’t impressed when Chris failed to do any pull-ups. Chris said he had more weight to pull up than anyone else. However Scott was impressed at how well Chris tried in all the other disciplines. Aled picked up the 10 points, Chris got 6 points and Dave and Will shared 3 points each.
Dr Hamilton joined the team for sex talk. He had a Sex Quiz for the team. Yesterday they had a condom cam. Here are the questions:-
1. Name 3 types of contraception?
Chris said Dave and Wills lass taking her make up off
2. Name 3 sexually transmitted diseases?
Dave said that he gets a form of herpes on his back.
3. What is Ithyphallophobia?
A. Fear of erect penises.
4. What is Venus Observa the latin for?
A. The Missionary Position
5. How many gallons of sperm does the sperm whale produce in one ejaculation?
A. 400 gallons
6. What is the average shelf life for a condom
Dave - Some of mine are older than Live Aid
A. 2 years
7. What is the age of sexual consent in the UK
A. 16
8. On average how often do men think about sex?
A. 7 seconds
9. Which is the odd one out, Jimmy Hat, Coil and the Johnnie?
A. The coil
10. Which of the following is not a STD, Climidia, Coitaphobia, trachamoniasis?
Coitaphobia - fear of sex
Tiebreak - How many women would sleep with a man if he refused to wear a condom
ANSWER - 45%
ROBBIE ROUND ONE
1. What is the name of Robbies mum? (Janet)
2. Shes the One was the double A side with which other track? (Its Only Us)
3. Robbie has played in 3 testimonial matches at Vale Park, True or False (True)
4. What was the highest chart position of Let Me Entertain You? (3)
5. In which year did Robbie join Take That? (1991)
6. Which song goes Sing me a love song, drop me a line? (No Regrets)
7. Which album featured Nutsford City Limits? (Sing When Your Winning)
8. Who duetted with Robbie on Kids? (Kylie)
9. What year was Rock DJ released? (2000)
10. With which record company did Robbie sign a multi million pound deal with last year? (emi)
still no phone call from Robbie
ROBBIE ROUND TWO
1. What is the name of Robbies dad? (Pete Conway)
2. What was Robbies first number 1? (Millennium)
3. True or False, Chris Sharrock is the name of the bass player of Robbies live band?
False - hes the drummer
4. Lazy Days got to which position? (8)
5. In which year did Robbie leave Take That? (1995)
6. Which song has the lines Live for Liposuction, detox for your rent? (Millennium)
7. Which album featured Jesus in a Camper Van? (Ive Been Expecting You)
8. Which former musical partner did Robbie write Angels with? (Guy Chambers)
9. Which year saw the release of the single Supreme? (2000)
10. True or False, Robbie has a sister called Sally?
True, he does
BB ALED
Big Brother decided to be nice and although they lost the task, they got up this morning to see the house all decked in Xmas material, well they had to do something with it, they bought it.
The Radio 1 staff voted for Cameron to win. Ray still thinks that Jon can win. Jon still has a problem with Cameron and called him a wet little rag. They brought back the pedalo and horses from the earlier tasks and dressed them up as a reindeer and the sleigh. Chris is convinced one wont come on the show like in previous years. Last year Jade and Alex didnt come in.
Daves Tedious Link
Madonna Into the Groove - Madonna is from Detroit, something she shares in common with Eminem - Eminems mother in 8 Mile was played by Kim Basinger - Basinger also starred in 9 and a Half Weeks alongside Mickey Rourke - Mickey Rourke shares the same christian name as Mickey Adams who manages Leicester - Leicester used to be sponsered by Walkers - Walkers are advertised by Gary Lineker and once by Michael Owen who is team mates with Steven Gerrard - Steven Gerrard shares a name with Gerard Depardieu who starred in Green Card alongside Andie McDowell - Andie McDowell share the same first name with Andi Peters who used to live in a broom cupboard as does Harry Potter under the stairs - Stairs can be a hindrance to elderly people forcing them to rethink and move into a bungalow - Bungalow is actually an Indian word and other Indian words are Naan and Kulfi - Kulfi is a type of exotic ice cream, something it shares with Vienetta - If you remove the last syllable from the word Vienetta you get Vienna which was a big hit for Ultravox and lead singer Midge Ure who I would imagine these days is enjoying the fruits of his musical labours and probably owns a flash car and lives in a house, a very big house in the country - Which links us to Blur and Country House
Fergus Dudley birthday today. His voice was heard on the show briefly and a cake was presented but none of the candles were lit because of health and safety. Aled sang Happy Birthday to Ferg in Welsh. Chris got some free stuff from Boots which were for Advanced Teeth Whiteners and an electric toothbrush.
